Tara Pringle Jefferson turns burnout into a blueprint for self-care

You’ve just about had it.

You’ve reached your limit. Everything and everyone is testing your patience, marking the end of your self-restraint. You’re out of energy and willingness to wait. Now, as Tara Pringle Jefferson makes clear in “Bloom How You Must,” it’s time to put your needs and self-care first.

All it took was a minor health crisis.

With two kids, a freelance business, and 18-hour days, Tara Pringle Jefferson endured constant pain she usually powered through – until she couldn’t anymore. Her doctor examined her and told her to take the weekend off. Seriously, rest.

This made Jefferson think. For generations, Black women have ensured that what needed to be done got done. How did they cope with oppression, overwork, and scarce resources?

By studying the lives of influential Black women, she discovered their secret: self-care matters. Even Coretta Scott King made time for herself, Jefferson notes. This tradition of Black women’s self-care, passed from mother to daughter, empowers each woman to seek what restores her sense of wholeness.

Jefferson offers ways to get you started.

Physical Wellness reminds you to moisturize your skin, eat right, get enough sleep, and enjoy the body you have.  Host a sister circle for Social Wellness. Find your own definition of success for Professional Wellness. “Do church” in a new way for Spiritual Wellness. Don’t let a need for mental wellness be stigmatized. Find your inner child, learn to play again, and tap into your Creative Wellness. And know that you are a child of survivors who gave you strength, but who also passed down intergenerational trauma, so be gentle and kind to yourself. Remember: you’re still rehabilitating.

As with most self-help books, “Bloom How You Must” is full of a lot of commonsensical things you probably already know. Also, as with most self-help books, it’s always nice to have the information you need all in one place.

The best thing about this self-help book is that the author, Tara Pringle Jefferson, focuses exclusively on the self-care and well-being of Black women. In doing so, she reaches into history to remind readers that the stress they’re experiencing today is a modern problem, but it’s also nothing new.  The care she advocates, therefore, has tinges of ancestry, which is comfortable but can also be surprising, in that she candidly discusses sex, relationships, and changing the way readers approach their spiritual well-being. Readers who are open and willing to change for better health and happiness may be taken aback by that, but it’s undoubtedly also going to leave you thinking.

Men who are curious can absolutely read this book, but it’s not for them – it’s purely for Black women who need help they can only find within themselves. If that’s you, then find “Bloom How You Must.” Because you must have it.